Confessions of the Intellectually Confused

FIBA Considering 3-on-3 Olympic Hoops

Sign me the Hell up. This would be more watched then the regular hoops tourney. There’s already 2 man bobsled, beach volleyball… 3-on-3 hoops. My god, the possibilities….

The Heat
Chris Bosh
LeBron James
Dwayne Wade
(This is fueled by the fact that the NBA needs to cooperate with FIBA more by sending their champ to face off against the best teams from the EuroLeagues… like every other true international sport. Also begrudgingly your favorite)

The Super Team that will never happen
Carmelo Anthony
Amare Stoudemire
Chris Paul
(This is the theme going forward. 3 entertaining players. A Point, shooter and post player. And these guys would be an easy #2 choice)

Dwight and Friends
Dwight Howard
Gerald Wallace
Deron Williams
(Cause he likes these guys. Wallace better have a flawless midrange game)

The Conquistadors
Serge Ibaka
Rudy Fernandez
Ricky Rubio
(The D2 Team Iceland of this tourney. The villains and highlight reel of the Eastern Hemisphere representing Spain)

The Old Flames
Luis Scola
Manu Ginobili
Pablo Priogini
(Argentina may be old but this team will surprise people using their bball IQ and raw skill)

The Cold War Kids
Timofey Mozgov
Andrei “AK-47” Kirilenko
Alexey Shved
(The Russians have 2 things to their name: they’re erratic and crazy. Gotta love a wildcard)

Team Douche
Joakim Noah
Nicholas Batum
Tony Parker
(The French are not douches. However, if this team is across the court you can help but think of douche thoughts. Parker cheated on his wife. Noah won’t shut up. Batum thinks he’s worth 40 mil)

Eastern European Raptors
Jonas Valenucias
Linas Kleiza
Rimas Kaukenas
(I’m sure Toronto will find another Lithuanian at some point)

That’s enough to get you started. China would send a team. I can see Dirk making a team just Spotify Germany doesn’t get shut out. Danilo Gallinari and Marco Belinelli would bribe a 3rd Italian. Puerto Rico and DR would fight to send a team. Also Greece would come in as the great unknown.

FIBA. Do the right thing. Make this happen. Stern. Don’t you even think blocking this